Community

This past Sunday, this postcard was featured on the Post Secret blog*.

Several people wrote in to respond to it:

-----Email Message-----

Please don't jump. I also wanted to jump off two years ago but I'm glad I didn't because things are now much better.


-----Email Message-----

My friend jumped off it in 2006. She was legal. I still miss her like hell. She might not have felt like she belonged in San Francisco, but she belonged somewhere. So do you.


-----Email Message-----

Come to Indiana. I want you here. You could belong here.

---


Then this facebook group was started...


Which has led to this event, this coming Sunday.


There's no denying that Facebook is a huge time suck-- but every now and then, it joins forces with an incredible cult art phenomenon and redeems itself a little bit.


*FYI, the Post-Secret blog contains some adult images and content.

How it's been.

Sunday: Work 7-3, Church setup @ 3:30, First AG baptism, Em's last night before leaving for Haiti.

Monday: Breakfast with Kim, visit Grandpa @ hospital, Memorial Day BBQ, small group at our house.

Tuesday: work 7-4, Dollar Burgers @ Llewellyns, attempt to tame my hair.

Wednesday: work 7-4, dinner at home, Cardinals game with Genteman fam.

Thursday: work 7-3, snack at home, drive to IL for Financial Peace University @ FBC Bethalto, dinner with Genteman fam.

Friday: bank, groceries, bills, laundry, etc, work 6:30-midnight @ Schlafly.

Saturday: eat breakfast, return library books, work 1-5 @ Dentyne promo gig, work 6-midnight @ Schlafly.

Sunday: start over.

Mix in my parents coming to visit for a week (which was wonderful), training a slew of new people at work, looking for a job that will let me use my degree, and sleeping.

"Daisy, let it go..."

I've been away. I've been full of life and empty of time to tell about it.

My parents came to town for a week and stayed with us. We had a lot of fun and ate a lot of good food. My mom and I participated in a craft fair and sold lots of delicious baked goods, including lemon cake bombs that ended up tasting like posh homemade zebra cakes. I saw Iron Man 2, was blessed with cute new mustard yellow flats and new thermal curtains that keep the blazing sun out of our window-walled upstairs bedroom. Also, Gotham ate and digested an entire tennis ball.

I also got my heart broken for the first time in a long time. I never imagined that getting dumped professionally and romantically would feel so eerily and heartbreakingly similar.

For the first time in my life, I wanted this job. I had the education and the desire to do it well. I was immediately attracted to it; I wanted to hang out with it and get to know it and fall in love with it and commit to it. On the exterior, and even on the shallow interior, me and this job were perfect for each other; it made me happy, it made sense, and I wanted it.

But the Lord obviously has other plans for me. Plans that I was utterly apathetic towards yesterday afternoon when I got the call that I was not selected for the position.

But today has been better. I imagine the coming days will be too. I go back to work at the Arch tomorrow and I put in my two weeks notice at Schlafly this past weekend (in favor of a summertime promotional gig). Todd and I are also starting Financial Peace University in a couple of weeks. I feel like days are flying by, and yet I'm also waiting-- impatiently and incessantly-- for new changes. All while trying to savor little moments in each set of 24 hours, and stay on top of every day life.

But I guess that's what you do when you're a grown up. I'll take it.

Lord, give me strength.

"You give and take away...
You give and take away...
My heart will choose to say,
"Blessed be Your name.""

Loverly

It's been a good day.

Our old, stinky, cantankerous dishwasher is GONE. In its place is a brand new shiny, good-smelling dishwasher that is practically silent. Magnificent.

My belly is full from a delicious dinner of whole wheat rotini pasta (my fave... well, any curly pasta is my face), brocolli, chicken and sauteed mushrooms with mozz cheese.

We took Gotham for a good walk and on the way, we met another neighbor with a Boxer, which was cool. But the best part was learning the names of some neighborhood kids (who are ALWAYS sitting out on the stoop when we walk Gotham in the evenings) Marilyn is the oldest, she's in seventh grade. She has a cousin, Brittany who sits out there with her, and then there are her 3 year old twin siblings... Luke and Leia. I kid you not. That is serious fandom commitment! I felt an instant connection. And the coolest/most unusual part? All the kids are black. Fantastic.

Tomorrow is Todd's LAST day at Starbucks! He's so excited to be back in full time ministry. And... I have an interview tomorrow. For a grown up job, in a marketing department. With books. Amazing books. :) I'm really excited about it, but I'm trying not to be, you know? I'll tell you more about it later...

And LOST. I can't even talk about it right now. I'm still processing. Sigh.

But.

It's been a great day. And I hope tomorrow's even better. :)

Restless.

I think that sometimes, when everyone around me seems to be experiencing change, I think I'm supposed to change too. Even if I'm already in the midst of a larger, more gradual change.

For example... even though I'm totally still settling into married life and a new community and city in St. Louis, three of my Schlafly co-workers are leaving or have already left. My husband is also starting a new job in a couple of weeks. So now, even though I'm grateful for the extra (easy) money that Schlafly provides, I find myself wanting *out of the restaurant business again, for no good reason.

Also, Todd and I are going to have to figure out some kind of compromise about our tv.

For the most part, I can't stand tv. I've only realized this over the past couple of years. Unless it's a show or a movie I love to watch, I feel like tv is intruding on my life, distracting my already ADD-riddled soul and imagination. While there are some movies and tv moments that I'm pleasantly surprised by, for the most part, it stresses me out. And it sucks because I know that for a lot of people, tv is an excellent escape. A de-frag. It is for Todd. And I have those moments too, occasionally. And of course I don't want to give up time with my husband! I want us to be able to relax on the couch together, but 75% of the time, channel surfing or just having the tv on when no one's actually watching it Stresses Me Out. *Denham's Dentrifice all over again. I can't deal with it. It makes me edgy.

I think I'd be less edgy if I could figure out how to focus my thoughts when I have TIME to focus them. But it's always so much easier during inopportune moments, like at church, or in the middle of an 8 hour work shift.

*sigh*

I gotta go. Life is waiting.



*When I read Fahrenheit 451 for the first time, I never though this bit would stick with me, but it has. It's always been a really relevant reference for me because I feel like I'm consistently troubled by it. "Denham's Dentrifice" is a reference to the toothpaste ad blaring on the subway while Guy Montag is trying to focus and memorize a chapter from the Bible. He keeps desperately trying to focus his thoughts, but the advertisement is relentless and he eventually flees the train. The book is so good. Read it if you haven't.

"Quieras ir afuera, perrito?"

I've been speaking Spanish to Gotham. That's usually the only thing I remember to say. (You wanna go outside, puppy?) But it's Spanish, nonetheless.

***

I parked for free today at work. I LOVE parking for free. I never realized what a luxury that is until I starting freaking working at the Arch. Anyway, at the Arch, your options are:

• Park in one of the 20 free spots at the cathedral (which always get filled up by 7am by the park rangers) and not have to walk but 90 seconds to get inside the building. Or park in a non-designated spot and potentially be towed.
• Park in the Arch garage for $4 before 9am and $6 after 9am. Daily. And walk 3-4 minutes to get inside the building.
  
• Park on the levee on the edge of the Mississippi. For free. And walk 5ish minutes to work... but for free!

I love parking for free. I used to be blessed with cathedral spots all the time. But lately, the river has been flooded, so the levee's been closed. So all the levee regulars took the cathedral spots and left yours truly in the expensive garage. But. The river has FINALLY receded and today, I parked for free, which is great-- except I'm terrified to park on the levee. It's only a slight incline, but my car is tall (Honda Element) and every time I get in or out of it and shut the door, I'm just sure its going to tumble into the Mississippi. There's nothing between my car and that raging, brown current except cobblestones-- and I don't know what I imagine the thing is made of, but I always assume its top-heavy and ponderous enough to succumb to a stiff breeze and topple over.

I know that's false. But I still get nervous.

But not nervous enough to pay for parking.

Hello, Hello...

After a week of feeling very disconnected, due to lack of internetz... I'm back. :)

I finished A Tree Grows In Brooklyn! Loved it. Apparently, I'm on a coming-of-age kick; I read, To Kill A Mockingbird, then Brooklyn and today I checked out The House On Mango Street and The Adventures of Huck Finn. I'm excited about both-- especially reading Huck Finn on the banks of the Mighty Mississip. :)

Right now, the dog is passed out from running in the park with his new friend, Oscar, a seven month old black lab mix. Todd and I are catching up on our online business and watching Mad Hot Ballroom, his first viewing, my second. I love this movie. And I need to learn Spanish. I said that last time I watched it.

Also, Milano cookies... are so... good.

More substance next post, I promise.