Dear Sixteen...

(jumpin on the bandwagon with a letter to my sixteen year old self... enjoy.)

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Hi Julie,

Let's be real about this. I know what you want to know. Yes, you get married, okay? But-- it's not to Nick. He's going to marry a cute Mexican girl. Yes, I'm serious. Breathe. You'll be fine.

I know that's the only thing you really want to know about, but all you actually need to know regarding this subject is that your super hot and hilarious future husband does exist and he is exactly everything that you want AND need. Oh and he's currently playing football in a tiny little town. That's all you get. Don't be mad, I wouldn't ruin this surprise for the world :)

So, I've only got one shot at this-- fortunately, I don't have many regrets to advise you about, so let's get practical, shall we?

First and foremost-- Student loan money is not fake money. They WILL make you pay it back. And you won't have it. So you need to apply for scholarships. I'm serious. Don't be a slacker. You need to submit roughly 100 essays before you enter college in two years. Do it now so you can enjoy going on dates with your husband with all the money you saved. Also, after college? When they send you all those letters about paying on your interest during a grace period? Don't throw those away because they say "This is not a bill" on them!!! PAY THEM! Get a server gig at a restaurant, save up some money and pay on it. Please? You will be so happy you did.

Other things that will help you out...

Love your hair. Take care of it. And buy a 1 inch flat iron. A 2 inch one will not make the process go faster.

Call Mudear on a regular basis. Rig up a tape recorder before you leave for college and ask her to tell you about her life. Record it. Then write it all out.

I'd tell you stop before you get to the Bailey's and coffee when you go to the cocktail party at Jared's house-- but you'll do it at some point anyway, and I'd rather you deal with that situation there, surrounded by friends, than somewhere else.

Any time you leave to go to school or any time a boy leaves YOU to move out of state, even if it's just temporary-- you need to break up with him and move on. I doubt you'll listen to me on this-- but you should. And don't waste time thinking that you'll get back together with anyone you break up with, because it will only happen once. And then it still won't work. But don't sweat it! Your man is making his way to you and he's all the best pieces combined into one body. He is worth every bit of the wait. Okay that's it! No more boy stuff!

If you mess up and do something dumb that hurts a friend-- 1) don't KEEP doing it and 2) don't wait 3 months to fess up.

Try out for a freaking musical at school. Just suck it up and do it, you'll really be missing out if you don't.

Look at the dock number when you get out of the little speed boat in Venice. Make an effort to remember how to get back there.

And my most important thing... keep writing... keep on and keep on and keep on-- and when you come home for a visit from college, save yourself a Blue Christmas. ALWAYS unload your car the moment you get into town. I'm not playin. Empty it all out. The fish too. But especially the DVD/journal box. Do not forget this. Empty the car!

I don't have much else to advise you about, kiddo. I won't save you from everything. You need a few good heartaches, it'll make you a better writer. But don't worry about anything. Trust the Jesus who your Mom and Dad taught you to love. He has some amazing stuff mapped out for you and He will NOT let you down. Talk to Him regularly about everything, and just remember that no matter how you occasionally feel-- you will not die of loneliness. Or virginity.

Each day gets better. Enjoy it and take lots of pictures!

Love,

Juliette

Confessing.

I've been such a lurker as of late. I've been reading lots of great blogs and not writing any. I've been thinking about my mermaid-esque treasure trove of incomplete ideas. I've been reading a lot of really entertaining nonsense-- and remembering some of my own entertaining, nonsensical ideas that I've long since abandoned. (Not without intent to return.) I've been thinking about old things-- the good things about old things and the better things about new things. I've been having new ideas and new desires (at the most inconvenient times) to revisit old ideas. I've been feeling outdated and underqualified for everything involving my professional life.

I've also had the hardest time spelling the word inconvenient today. I've used spell check on it 3 times in the past 12 hours.

I feel bad about the days when I don't want to deal with people. Even fun people. I know everyone has days like that, but I don't really have time to have days like that.

I feel responsible for several people who I don't really know very well yet-- and I think the majority of that feeling is one of responsibility to spend time with those new people and get to know them better. But sometimes, I feel like there are still so many "old people" left in my heart, who I still love and care about and want to know about. Facebook happily, continuously and cryptically updates me concerning their lives and their business-- but its not the same. I've always been terrible at letting go.

Maybe that's the reason I haven't met any really cool new ideas lately. Maybe my community life and my writing life just need a jumpstart.

i AM working on a new project. With a partner. But I can't talk about it and I can't talk about why. :) But I'm happy about it and I hope it goes well.

If something else happens, I'll try to keep you posted.

Uno. Dos. Tres.

-I wonder if I'll ever NOT be tense driving through Illinois backroads. Some of them are so small and bumpy and Todd flies over them like he poured the asphalt himself. Zero respect. I get nervous. Also, there's nothing more unsettling than a concrete construction barrier that forces you into just two lanes on an unfamiliar highway. So scary.

-I think self-inflicted drama should have an age limit. I know that The Real Housewives and The Bad Girls Club and Sex In The City beg to differ, but there's just really no excuse for such poor behavior in grown people. It makes me sick and sad every time I witness it.

-In other news, I got to shoot my father in law's rifle pellet gun today. In the basement. I've never shot anything larger than a handgun, unless you count the water cannon I wielded annually at summer camp. He set up a cardboard box target for me and I aimed from roughly 30 feet away-- I only shot two times... and I hit the bullseye both times! So fun! Next time, maybe I'll attempt a real rifle... outside of course. :)

Post-Eclipse

Stephenie Meyer's four volume, 2500 page (more or less) saga is just further proof that when you're telling a compelling story-- you can take as much time as you need.

I finished Eclipse today. One more book to go-- I'm ready for the ending, whatever it is. And so far, the ride has been a lot more entertaining than I'd anticipated. The second book had a lot of the really cool backstory I'd been hoping for-- and of course, loads of drama. I really enjoyed it.

Just one more volume and I'm through.

Oh, and I haven't changed my mind. Forced to choose, I'd still pick a werewolf over a vampire.

Post- New Moon

I woke up this morning riddled with allergies. Very uncommon. I managed to clean up the downstairs part of the house this morning, but besides that, I've been lazing about trying to clear the haze from my head. Part of that strategy included finishing Volume 2 of the Twilight saga. And I must say, I really enjoyed it. Intriguing conflict, well-developed characters, excellent storytelling.

However, I find Bella to be morose, unbelievably selfish and overly worshipful of Edward and vampires in general. I hope she grows some self-esteem and some basic human courtesy in the next book.

Edward was sort of out of the picture in this one, but when he came back, he was his same stubborn, overprotective, freezing cold self. Whatevs. They're perfect for each other.

I really like the rest of the Cullens though, Alice in particular. And I'm still intrigued by the mystery of Rosalie.

And then there's Jacob. Confident, sweet, comforting, WARM-blooded Jacob. I really liked him and felt terrible for him when Bella just blew snot and tears all over him for 400 pages and then threw him away.

I guess, as of now, that puts me on Team Jacob. I'll let you know how Eclipse goes.