I'm so behind...

- This reminds me of that Jim Gaffigan bit about people who want to talk about a movie 8 months after it came out because they just saw/loved it... but I just figured out Google Analytics... and I really hope somebody looks at my blog soon because I want to see it in action!

- Gotham watched The Dark Knight for the first time this week. He also threw up another sock. (I'm assuming) He pulled this one out of the hamper while I was in the shower and threw it up after I got out.

- Culinaria is my happy place. Well, one of them. I LOVE grocery shopping there. Everything-- the flowers, the produce, the meats and fish and sandwich shop and olive bar and wine cellar-- is all so fresh and inviting and lovely and city chic. You have to park in a garage and ride an elevator back down to street level to get to the little urban market. Standing in the garage window, looking down at the streets, I feel like I'm in NYC every time. I love it. One day I will shop there all the time.

- Lots is happening. And I'm trying to figure it all out. I'll try to write something of consequence soon... till then, THIS is kinda strange, but pretty cute. And I don't even like teeth.

- How did I not know that my roommate's family makes oatmeal?! How did I miss this?!

Uno Mas...

Dear Imo's,

You need to stop telling people you are "St. Louis Style Pizza". If you don't, when tourists come through, they're going to start nasty rumors that people who live in our fair city believe that cardboard with ketchup and government cheese on it is pizza. Erroneous. If Italy was dead, it would be rolling over in it's grave every time you made a delivery. Get with the program and make us proud.

~juliette

"You're nasty!!!"

This is absolutely one my favorite things right now. Enjoy!

Catching Up with @ladyjuliette...

I don't actually tweet. But. Here are the past few days, in roughly 140 characters or less...

• Schalfly Stout & Oyster Fest: 1 weekend, 12 pro shuckers, 29,000 shells. And a lot of beer. Most relaxed 12 hour shift I've worked in a long time.

• If someone really wanted to punish me, they could lock me inside the walk-in of a commercial kitchen and make me scoop cocktail sauce out of a vat into a hotel pan with a plastic pitcher.

• Still can't believe I had to miss the Horan/Halbert nups in Austin on Saturday... the Gentemans will be making it up to them... within the year, I hope?
  

• There are SO many pregnant people and SO many new babies in my orbit right now. If I could afford to stock up on other liquids, I think I'd stop drinking the water.

• via @toddcontact: On Monday afternoon, on the way to pick up new dog food, Gotham started dry heaving in the front seat. After several seconds, he threw up an entire sock.

• Post Secret @ Maryville U: An excellent date night and a powerful presentation/demonstration on the impact of community.

• In a rush on Tuesday morning, I accidentally locked only one side of Gotham's two-doored kennel before leaving for work. He was alone in the house for 8 hours. You can imagine what I came home to.

• Actually, you don't have to. I'll tell you. I came home to my puppy locked in a dark bathroom pacing a poop-strewn floor. That's right. Be jealous.
  

• Before he locked himself in, he made himself at home. When I walked in, it looked like someone had ransacked our house and squeezed puppy bowels all over it. I bleached everything.
  

• But thank God he didn't hurt any furniture and only relieved himself on hardwood and linoleum. Good boy. Sort of.
  

• I'm allergic to spring in Missouri... at least I am this week. My head feels like a balloon and my nose feels like Santa got stuck trying to come down the chimney.

• Praise the Lord for authentic Mexican food within walking distance from the house.

• Just finished watching Secret Life of Bees. Bawled my eyes out several times. Mostly because I love my family... and I miss my Mudear.

• Hubby's home :) time to catch up on LOST!

Letters

Dear Downy Wrinkle Releaser,

I'd appreciate it if you would stop masquerading as a miracle product behind your trusty label. I am convinced you are nothing but water mixed with a hint of fabric softener.

~juliette



Dear Womens Jr. High & High School Volleyball Outfitters,

Good on you, deciding that six-inch spandex spankies are absolutely neccessary for peak athletic performance of indoor volleyball. Man, what a great idea, selecting the most self-concious, self-obsessed, insecure, competative, mean, and catty sect of people imaginable and parading their various maturing body types around in front of each other AND their sex-saturated schoolmates (not to mention some of their creepy dads, uncles and teachers/coaches) in last season's Victoria's Secret bikini bottoms. You sure know how to punch up game attendance during the competing football season.

~juliette



Dear *Kingston & Paddie,
I'm not gonna lie, you're pretty cute when you're sleeping. But when you're freaking out and snorting and snarling and nipping and growling and yelping and rubbing your slobber-soaked, smashed face all over my son's beautiful coat, I want to punt you across the neighborhood.

~juliette

*you know.



Dear Next Door Neighbor,

You're clearly a little bit Hispanic. But I still can't figure out why you have a Rebel flag flying on a large pole in your front yard. Todd and I sometimes stare out our bedroom window, brainstorming ways to remove it. Our favorite idea so far is via flaming arrow.

~juliette



Dear Season Six of LOST,
I just realized I shouldn't write to you, for spoilers sake... but suffice it to say I'm getting a little frustrated. You've only got like 8 or 9 episodes left and I'm expecting quite a bit out of you. Please don't disappoint me.

~juliette

Whatta man, whatta man, whatta man...

My husband told me that despite our tight budget, we need to go on a hot/interesting date at least once a month. So next Monday, we're going to dinner and then to the Post Secret event at Maryville U in St. Louis. He bought us tickets the other day.

What a mighty good man. :)

Why Jimmy Fallon Is The Best Late Show On TV.

I can't believe this happened-- or that I missed it live!!! Who (with the capacity to pull it off) would even think to do this?! Jimmy Fallon, you made my whole day. I can't even tell you how many of my M.A.S.H. lists contained the name "William James Jones".

Ladies & Gentlemen-- the reunion of the California Dreams!



Thanks for the heads up, Ginger. :)