Cubical Musings

So, following in the footsteps of the lovely Annie Parsons, I am currently working in an office as a Temptress. These are some of the idle thoughts that momentarily take me away from my daily to-do list...

• When I wear heels at work, I use the long open aisle in the warehouse to practice my runway walk/posture. It helps that there's also a huge metal fan at the end of the "runway" waiting to give you model hair just before you walk back into the office.
  
• one of our sales guys is named Joe Fabian. He lives in Reno. I think his name makes him sound like a New York City landlord and when he calls the office, it makes me want New York Style pizza.
• The names of two of our major clients, no lie: French-Gerleman (which I always say in my head with a degrading, fake, male Austrian accent) and Carlton-Bates (which just makes me want to dance).
• My boss's boss's last name is Ripper. Oddly enough I dont' think it's very scary because it reminds me of Jesse & The Rippers.
• Ex-Pirate Band Kids- One of my co-workers totally has the Mr. Davis smile. Hilarious.
• How do people end up with last names like Trout and Fish?
• Speaking of last names... another guy I work with has the last name "DuBuque". Which is supposed to be pronounced "Doob-yook" But every single time I look at it (or him) I say "Doo-boo-qway-qway" (in my head). This is why.
• I spend a lot of time electronically recording our receipt of metal parts. These parts have huge long alphanumeric item numbers. Sometimes the item numbers look like horrible, scary Polish or Welsh words (i.e. KQG2H07N02S). I find myself still trying to pronounce these things as words.
• Checking in orders is more exciting if I pretend I'm checking in droids and engine parts for starpilots and smugglers.
• I like my green pen the best.
• I feel like working at the Arch made me become a mild germophobe out of boredom. I used to clean things with bleach wipes daily just to pass the time (and also because there were upwards of 6000 people walking through there daily in the summertime). Now it's just me at my desk and I'm still using hand sanitizer and wiping things down with Clorox wipes.
• My boss looks like a slightly older Donna from "That 70's Show".
• Good penmanship is invaluable.
• Penmanship is such a great word too. I think it connotates someone with fabulous, ornate handwriting, scrawing their name with a giant, feathery pen. Possibly wearing a powdered wig or large pirate-type hat.
• I hate when I go to use the office IM system and I've left CAPS lock on and IT SOUNDS LIKE I'M SHOUTING OR BEING HATEFUL even if I'm just asking WHERE ARE THE PAPERCLIPS?
• Another last name: Pottorf. I can't ever spell it right. And I think it sounds like a name for a Mighty Morphin Power Ranger villain.
• I don't know what in the world would come out of my mouth when I answered the phone if the company name wasn't plastered in front of me. It's like I forget every time the phone rings. That'll change with time, I hope.
• Todd and I have been re/watching Season 2 of Chuck. The other day, Sarah, the girl who trained me, made a phone call that started like this: "Hi Chuck, this is Sarah over at ControlTech..." I couldn't stop grinning.
• I'm really glad office computer screens don't have talking screens like at the self-checkout at the grocery store. Could you imagine if your computer spoke every button you clicked?
• I seriously adore post-it notes.
• Every time I get one of those crazy invoice numbers with "QB" somewhere in it, I think about Matt Sarazen. And every time I get one with "PYC" or "PY3" somewhere in it, I sing "PYT".

More to come, I'm sure...